What would you say if we could start making your dreams come true right now? What would your life be like if you let go of one thing that isn’t serving you? Have you been wanting to make a change but didn’t know where to start?
There are countless tips, tricks, and tools that I could fill a 4-hour workshop discussing. We don’t need that. We are already in information overload! So, for the sake of brevity and ease, I will outline the 3 most crucial and foundational steps you can take starting right now. Without further ado….
Step One: Decide you are worth it
According to Dr. Joe Rubino, author of “The Self-Esteem Book”, 85% of the world’s population are affected by low-self esteem. This means that the vast majority of us are walking around thinking that we aren’t worthy of a better life or, at least, we know of someone who feels this way. When we start taking risks, the ego sees this as a threat. When the ego sees this as a threat, it will tell us to stay safe-that’s its job. The problem is that safe is stuck and stuck is what keeps us from making the change we desire.
We live in a culture that perpetuates this myth of “not enough”, that self-care is self-ish and guess what? Our suffering is only lining the pockets of those who don’t have our best interests at heart. Step One may mean you will need to do a deep dive to uncover the blocks weighing you down or that you may need to slay some dragons. I promise you it’s hard work AND it’s worth it.
A good place to start this process is by opening up your journal or grabbing a piece of paper and asking yourself some powerful questions such as “what do I want more of in my life?”, “what do I want less of in my life?”. We do things because we want to feel a certain way. Once you have connected with how you want to feel, you are ready for Step Two.
Step Two: Get clear on your biggest challenge
Choose only one. The authors of the book, “The one thing”, suggest that multitasking is a very effective way to screw up two things at once.
If you are having a tough time figuring out what your challenge is, remove yourself from all distractions (yes, this includes the environment where the overload started in the first place) so that you can get clear. Ever notice that when you go on vacation, all of a sudden you find the solution to the problem you were ruminating over at work? Or you go for a walk to “clear your head”? The implications are, needless to say, inspiring: what you’ve done is created space for the answers to come to you gracefully rather than forcing matters of the heart through logic.
Another suggestion if you are trying to decide where to start is to ask yourself “Which one of these would bring me the most value in my life right now?” Or “which one of these challenges feels lighter?” It is tempting to go after all the things that are weighing us down at once, but you will only recycle that energy and worsen your situation by taking on too many challenges at one time.
ONE bite! If you have become clear about where you will be able to experience the most value, then, my friends, you are ready for Step Three.
Step Three: Set yourself up for success and get ready to take action!
This is the step where you need a plan! The universe rewards action. You are about to put into practice what you have identified as the one thing that will bring you the most value in your life right now. Statistics show that people are more likely to achieve their goals if they write them down. Did you know that only 3 out of 100 people actually write down their goals? Successful people do the things that others do not. Would you like to be those 3 or the other 97?
Setting small, realistic, and achievable goals within a time frame will ensure your success. The idea is to underwhelm rather than to overwhelm.
So, who will support me? Surround yourself with family and friends that want nothing but to see you succeed. Enlist a go-to person to help you through days when you find yourself struggling. Sharing your goals with a ‘confidant’ has been proven to increase your chances of achieving them. And remember that it is okay to stumble, after all, we are only human. So if you need to go back to step one, then do so. What matters is that you stay inspired by remembering your worth and you choose to stay in the game.
In all likelihood, as you move through your process, at some point, you will get bored. This is a very good sign! You’re over it and ready for the next project. What once was your challenge has now become second nature. Harness the energy of your recent success and apply it to your next endeavour. It’s time to celebrate!! And it is very important that you celebrate all of your achievements to foster an environment that continues to support your highest good.
Let’s sum it all up, shall we?
The process of long lasting change occurs when you decide you’re worthy enough to start. Eating an elephant happens like this: Decide you are hungry enough and you need this elephant to not just survive, but to thrive. Now, where on the elephant do you want to start? Get out your knife and carve yourself out a steak. Now, sit down at the table amongst your loved ones. Last, take your tools and start slicing one bite-sized amount at a time. Chew at least 30 x before swallowing. Repeat until the meat is gone and you are ready for seconds.
Yours in self-care,
Kendra
